Dy-no-mite. Dy-no-mite.

Ok. There’s only so much I can take of summer anymore. I can’t express to you how much I loathe hot weather. I mean ABHOR it. Fuck hot weather, fuck swimming, fuck boats, fuck bikinis, fuck being outside when it’s hotter than 75 degrees. I figured once it hit September it would start to cool down a bit.

Nope.

It was a good ol’ 91 degrees today. UGHHHHHH. STOP ITTTTT. Please, for the love of everything good and holy in the world, COOL DOWN. FUCK YOU, SUN. With a sandpaper condom. I went to go get Chinese today, and AS SOON as I stepped outside, the sun as beating down and my car felt like a sauna. Walking from my car to the Chinese place (all of 100ft) felt like I was trekking across the fucking Mojave. Came back home, and walked inside, and felt like I immediately had to turn on all ceiling fans and bump the temp down from 74 to like 71. I felt like I couldn’t cool down. And to think I actually thought I would go running today! Ha!

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So, on “not hot outside” news, I have done absolutely jack shit this weekend. I can honestly say I totally wasted three good days to get anything done and have nothing to show for it. All I did was lay around, whine about being bored, wash some clothes, and eat. Come to think of it, that’s how I spend every weekend…

So, GP and I watched Black Dynamite earlier, and I have to say, I haven’t laughed that much at a movie in a long time. The director and writers did an amazing job getting the culture perfect, and the writing was spectacular. If you’re not familiar, Black Dynamite is a series that airs on Adult Swim as a cartoon, but before it was a cartoon, it was a parody of a Blaxploitation film that featured an ass whipping, crime fighting badass named Black Dynamite. He basically goes around whipping ass to find who started selling and distributing “Smack” around his community and children. The movie is a complete comedy, and very much rated R, and it packs so many laughs that my sides were hurting. You have to have a sense of humor…if you’re one of those who are so uptight and politically correct that you could make a diamond if someone shoved coal up your ass, keep on moving. Need a good laugh after you’ve put the kiddies and elderly to bed? Black Dynamite is your movie!

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Well, I’ve got plans to COMPLETELY run in the morning. COMPLETELY. Like TOTALLY get up in the morning and run. I’m serious. Stop rolling your eyes. As of right now, I’m watching Halloween: H2O for some reason (GP put this shit on, he’s a major Halloween series fan) and I’m writing to you good people. I think we’re just watching random shit for the rest of the night. We also watched Dragon: The Story of Bruce Lee earlier. Good movie. I don’t think I would watch it again though. I also DVR’ed a BUNCH of No Reservations earlier. There was a marathon on, and I just couldn’t resist. This is the last tour, damnit!!! I don’t know what I’m gonna do with no more of my baby’s daddy Anthony Bourdain. Le weep.

Have a good night!

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